Absolute truth!!

Ok so today it hit me!!! Slap bang between the eyes!!!!! I was driving to my parents this morning when this happened and I almost made an accident the shock was so great!!

For the first time in my life I was able to be brutally honest with myself and if you would like to know what this honesty was? Well I will tell you this truth that hit me so hard this morning, at 09h55.

I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE ANYMORE!!! Yes I have at long last been honest with myself, I want to be in a relationship, I want someone to love me, I want someone to take care of me, I want to be there for someone when he comes home from work or wherever. I have made up my mind that I want this and I will have it.

I am going to meet my future husband in December and move to a strange country with him. I will be at long last finding my purpuse and that is to have a mate. He is not just any mate, he is my soulmate, my twinflame, the being I spend a lot of time with when I am not on this plane experiencing the human life, in this life though it is destinined that we will be together!

I have been pushing and fighting against this idea even though I accepted his offer to move to his country, I have been so negative and scared and doubtful that I actually have been starting to create a negative result, but no more!!!

Last nite I had a friend over and he actually came to have sex, lol I was ok until he started talking about all these other woman and something in me just snapped if I can call it that? I suddently realised I don't want to be with this man, I made him coffee, had a chat and then I send him on his way.

He just wants to use me and ok I will also be using but I don't want this anymore, I want to be with someone I love, I respect, that loves and respects me as well. Someone that sees the beauty in me and not just a play thing for his weird needs.

I am very guilty there I have always played along with this as I thought that it is also something I need but I realised this morning, ok it started last night but it smacked me this morning! I want so much more, I deserve so much more and now is the time to acknowledge this fact and accept it, as you know accepting something can be very difficult, but i am accepting this and I will change my life to make sure I get what I want.

I am now in a much more peaceful space having acknowledged this and busy with the acceptance of it.

I am now ready to start a new life and let go of my old ways. The date today is so significant for this 11/11 it usually means the end of times so I am coming to the end of a life and starting a new life. One with a wonderful, caring, giving, loving man who I will cherish and spoil and love very much as he is my heart, my life and my destiny.

Go well and love to all