Quiet

Ok so I have been very quiet the last week or so. A lot of things have happened and it sort of freaked me out a little bit.

I have been very busy, was sort of coaxed out of my little hole, comfort zone and went out more lately. It was nice and I enjoyed myself but I almost instantly wish I was back alone at my place.

Now don't get me wrong I really enjoyed myself but being an introvert it is very difficult to mix with others when u have indulged in doing your own thing.

I did something last week that was so nerve wrecking and exciting at the same time and made me just want more!!! I am not going to go into detail here as it is very private.

I also became very brave and confronted someone who knows I detest confrontation. It was a very freeing experience to actually stand my ground.

Sexy man is not just a sexy man he is a very wise man and showed me that the person feeling inadequate and with no self esteem or worth tried to turn all the tables on me. Thank you sexy man u are the best thing in the world. I hope you realize that?

I also became extremely brave and booked myself a holiday in December on my own. It is the first time I am doing something like this. All my life I have been going to other people, family, friends etc.

Although I have already got a couple of commitments for the holiday with friends in Cape Town I will only see them for a day and not every day as it always have been. I am honest looking way forward to this experience.

My sister who is not really my sister but if I had to have one she would be it as she is a soul sister has created a chat site for me and it is so exciting to watch her do it. I stayed with her this last weekend and went with her to her daughters matric farewell. Do you know every single girl that was there looked like a fairy princess it is so wonderful to see these beautiful girls going into womanhood and so beautiful and poised.

It was such a wonderful weekend as I visited with them, relaxing and comforting being with someone that loves and cares for you. The funny thing was we could sit for hours together not saying a word and it was ok as just being with her was wonderful. It is truly lovely and wonderful to have a sister and friend that understands that you don't have to talk the whole time. It is just to be together that is important.

I have moved into such a wonderful space at the moment and almost feel myself again, happy and content with the way things are going. I am full of laughs and find it funny that I allowed myself to fall into a bottomless pit which is not so bottomless after all.

I promise to write more often as it really helps to just get the stuff off my brain and somewhere else.

Have a sunshine day!